After a late Friday night (full of laughing and talking with our tattooist... well, we were laughing and talking and DH just grimaced for most of it it was in a painful spot on his arm...) I'm up late after a nice sleep in (til nearly 9am!!)and about to start a weekend chock full of study!
Thought I would update, first though...
The guy who bought the tyres has just picked them up and given us the $60 he owes us. The lady who bought the cabinet dropped by on Thursday to pay $50 off and buy 10 cupcakes she asked me to make for her. She asked if she could pay for the rest of the cabinet next week, as she is a bit short of money this week due to unexpected kids expenses (totally understand - my mum deals with this all the time), I told her it was fine. She is a lovely lady, single with two kids and I think she is doing it tough (obviously not too tough as she can buy cupcakes!). I have her address and phone number, and she has already given us $60 toward it. We could sell it again for no hassles if she changed her mind.
Also, she asked if I made birthday cakes I doubt my abilities with cake decorating, even though that is what I am employed to do. (BTW, 'cake-decorating' as a term, when I use it anyway, actually means: making the cake, and then decorating it... in case people are confused!) I don't like making things for people I know, or people who seek me out as an individual. I am afraid they won't like what I do. I need to get over this, as I realise I can make some pretty good-looking and great-tasting cakes most of the time. (sometimes... most times... better than my boss shh, don't tell him I said that...)
I just don't have any of the supplies or equipment to make them at my house. DH is always encouraging me to 'invest' in these things and I think it's an unneeded expense. Maybe not. I don't know? I could probably make some good side-money, and even if I just bought the decorating equipment and left the actual cake-baking to be done at work, in my own time and paid for the scratch ingredients from my boss. Things to think about, I guess.
Heard back from one of the jobs, unsuccessful. (what a surprise... not). I suppose I will not hear from the other ones. I do not always get an email saying I was unsuccesful, they usually just leave you hanging. Nice.
I have begun taking some pre-conception vitamins (holy dooly, are they expensive! I don't take vitamins as our diet is varied and healthy, but I figured I probably should for this as it's recommended... even at a discount chemist a months supply is $20) DH had a doctors appointment on Thursday and has to get some blood tests done next week. I also have to find a doctor, and get a check up. And go to the dentist. Sigh. Next week...
My best friend quit. It was the day after she had that guilt-trip from my boss's wife, and after I had that horrible phone conversation with her too. I did not work that day (worked at my other job), but the next day (thursday) I went in and my boss was SUPER nice to me. Almost too nice. I guess he is afraid that I will up and leave too, because of his wife. You know... even though he is a really nice guy (apart from the lying and obsession with his social status) I wish I was offered a job right now, just so I could ring up his wife and say 'I quit, and it's because of you and your unprofessionalism'.
I know, it's a bit low and immature. But look at what I have had to put up with! Would you really blame me??
My boss would survive. He's worked very long days before. Perhaps his wife will have to help out at the shop a bit more than her token once-a-month visit?
DH has some work this week which is great. Even though he's had a few weeks off, our bank account is still looking healthy.
We have been doing the weekly grocery shop on Saturdays or Sundays, together. It is easier for me this way and saves time with DH coming. (Even though he usually wanders around looking at other stuff). This week looks like it will be a really small shop: we have so much stuff in our pantry it's ridiculous, even though I have not bought a lot of stuff over the past couple of weeks either.
We're doing the shop tomorrow (Sunday) and I am going to make our meal plan off what we have in the pantry, and just nip into town for the essentials, and fresh fruit and veges.
I'm thinking our meal plan will go something like this:
sweet & sour tofu with egg noodles
pumpkin & cashew stirfry with basmati rice
baked fish, salad & sweet potato
mexican beans & rice
steamed vegetables, tofu & rice
We ate our first bananas since January, last week!!! It was very exciting for us. Since the floods in January bananas have been about $15-$20 a kilogram. Doesn't matter if they are organic or not, price is the same. Well, shopping at our local organic grocer we spied them at $9.99 a kilogram so we bought four little golden, beautiful, sweet cavendish. They were lovely! The oranges have been delicious lately too...
DH is having sellers remorse on some of the items we sold at the garage sale oh well. He sold a PS1 for $7 with a whole heap of games, a chip, two guns etc. His uncle rang him the next day to see if he still had it, and said he would have given him $40! Even still, last night our tattooist said he would have given us $60! What are the chances?! (But, it went to a young high school girl who is no doubt going to have a lot of fun with it... I personally think it went to a good home). In the end, we made $450 and I think the reason we made that much was because our prices indicated we wanted to sell the stuff, not have people umm and aah over the price, but instead go 'hey! I'm going to buy that! Right now!'.
The coffee table (the one I didn't want him to sell! lol!) he sold for $40. Then two people came back that had been in the morning to ask about it, and asked how much he sold it for. LOL. But like the PS1, it has a nice selling-story to it too: the guy bought it because he wants to teach his grand-daughter to play chess. I mean, could you ask for it to go to a better home?!
And lastly, my poor baby Banjo!!! Earlier this week, he kept licking his face and seemed to not be closing his mouth. (He is a dog that pants half the time... so I wasn't especially worried at first, but then it got to a stage where I was a little worried). We tried looking at his gums and teeth, nothing. His breath was a lot smellier than normal. I took him to the vet on Thursday. The vet looked at his gums and teeth (as DH and I did), couldn't find anything, suggested maybe he had a sore throat and got a flashlight to inspect the inside of his mouth. Opens Banjo's mouth and what do we find, but a piece of a stick jammed in the roof of his mouth, horizontally between the molars on the left and right side! (hard to describe...) The vet said 'ahh, this is your problem!' quickly reached in and pulled it out. Our poor Banjo must have had it in for a few days, two great big holes on the inner side right next to his teeth and huge cut across the roof of his mouth (and blood!). The vet gave us some painkillers and antibiotics to clear up the infection. He asked if Banjo had trouble eating or drinking. Nope! I had even given him a bone the day before. Our vet laughed and said 'This ones a tought nut!'
On the trip home he sat in the front seat and when I looked over, he was curled up in a little ball with his paws on his snout. Fresh pain after getting it pulled out... ouch. He was a brave little fellow. I feel so bad that I didn't know, but the vet said unless you knew what to look for you wouldn't have known - he said he didn't expect to find that at all, he just thought Banjo had a sore throat, and that you wouldn't have been able to see without a light, as the roof of Banjo's mouth is speckled anyway, the stick was pretty much camoflaged. Poor Banjo!!! Total cost $70.25 for short vet visit, A/B & pain meds. (worth every penny I should add!!!!)
Here are some pictures of the last time we took them out, to my little sisters birthday picnic in the park:
Viewing the 'Setbacks' Category
After a late Friday night (full of laughing and talking with our tattooist... well, we were laughing and talking and DH just grimaced for most of it it was in a painful spot on his arm...) I'm up late after a nice sleep in (til nearly 9am!!)and about to start a weekend chock full of study!
It is nearing breaking point at my workplace with everyone. I don't like to whinge too much about my job here (because well, I know I do it a lot, so every extra post is another whine that no one wants to hear about). But I can't really anywhere else... sorry guys!
My best friend quit this morning. She has been off sick a few times lately. First with a broken arm - tripped over something at her house in the dark getting ready for work (works night shifts). Second time, she had salmonella poisoning. Third time, which she is off work right now from, a bulging disc in her back is pressing against a nerve. She is on extreme painkillers, spends all day and night lying on a mattress in her parents loungeroom. Is only allowed to get up for roughly 5 minutes, three or four times a day (basically... to go to the toilet). Will be like this for a week.
These things are not her fault, but even so, she made the painful journey to work yesterday, to talk to our boss and his wife. My boss has no balls (excuse the crass language) and did not talk to her. Let his wife do the talking. And did she talk! And, within earshot of everyone at the workplace, which I thought was very unproffesional.
She talked to my friend (who is a 26 year old woman) like a naughty child. I have heard her talk to her children, and that is how she talked to my friend. She went on to say that her husband has to get up off his deathbed (no, he's not dying. not even sick) to work for her and that they can't rely on her. If they still had the other baker (who left, 9 months ago) she would have been fired by now. Also that she needs to take better care of herself, and if she has any time off after this, she is getting fired. She also went on to say that this is extremely stressful for her because her and her husband have not had a holiday in years, and now she feels like she can't go away for a week without stressing that no one will show up for work.
First of all, she's being a drama queen about it all. Secondly, her personal aspects of running a business have nothing to do with the staff she employs. And lastly, it's a small family business, what exactly does she expect if she employs the bare minimum of staff with the lowest amount of hours possible? Of COURSE her husband is going to have to work extra if someone is sick. If that's the way you operate, that's what you get when it all goes kaphooey. Idiot.
Anyway, my friend quit. She sais she's saving everyone the hassle of firing her and doing it to herself. She has a car that's about to stop working because it needs a new gearbox, she booked and paid for a holiday a year ago that's due in a month and is freaking out about that. She told me if she could get her money back she would do it in an instant - but she can't, not even half.
On top of that, which is enough to make my blood boil, the boss's wife, shall we call her J, asked me yesterday if I wanted extra hours while people take holidays later this month. I said sure. She then went on to talk about me working afternoon shifts, which is something I don't do normally, and I wouldn't be able to organise uni around. I said to her (nicely) that if it meant extra hours but doing afternoon shifts, then no to worry about it, as I couldn't do it. She got in a huff, said 'Fine! Don't Worry about it!' and stormed off. A few minutes later came up to me and started on about needing to know if I could EVER work afternoons and if they could RELY on me and whether I wasn't FLEXIBLE anymore. I initially started to explain but when I saw that it was more about her talking at me rather than listening to what I had to say, I ignored her and carried on with my work. Later on when I had gotten home, I sent her a text message. It read:
'I don't expect my studies to be important to you, but they are important to me. I started them because even though I asked, there is no possibility of advancement in my current job. To change my schedule, I need a lot of notice as I plan my semesters' assessments and tutorials based on times I will be available to do them. I don't expect you to know several months in advance when you will need me, and I don't expect you to care about my workload either. I just wanted you to understand this is why it is difficult for me to tell you if I am available for afternoon work.'
This is the way she talks to people, she is blunt and unapologetic. I can be blunt. I usually am a little nicer but I figured this is what she gets. She rang me to tell me 'accusing her of not caring is being catty'. I told her I didn't say she didn't care, I said I didn't expect her to. (she is always talking about how hard her life is because she has two young children, and no one would understand how little time she has unless they have children too. And run a business)
She went on to say that I ahve been hostile and resentful to her lately, and that she feels like I would not give her the time of day. I said 'actually, you're right. I wouldn't. I don't appreciate the way you talk to me, and other people, and I know I am not the only one who feels this way.' Other things were said as well. I didn't lose my temper, I just got everything out in the open.
As usual though, she didn't take anything in at all. She turned it all around on me and the other staff ('We have given you SO much, more than any other business would. Who else gives you birthday presents? Engagement presents? Huh? And I spend all this time defending you against other staff because you didn't lose as many hours as them.')
And when I brought up the incident a few months ago to do with my sister, she turned it, as usual, on me. ('I know you must have been stressed out, and that is why the conversation ended up as it did'). I said, 'You come across as though you don't care at all about what's going on in people's lives at all. We all hear about how the business is affecting you and how cutting staff hours affects you and your husband, but you do not care, do not want to listen and don't give anyone the time to talk about how losing shifts affects them. You don't ask how anyone is going and then you get angry when you hear people complain.'. She went on to say I was contradicting myself, because when I called about my sister, I didn't want to discuss why she couldn't work. Excuse me? That is a completely personal matter - all that she needed to know was that she could not work - there is no reason for her to know why a 15 year old junior casual staff member can't work a four hour shift. When I mentioned that she yelled at me after I told her my sister was in hospital she said 'that's not the way I remember the conversation'. She said she sent me a text the next day because she felt the conversation didn't sit well with her (oh? really?). I interupted her at that point, and mentioned that the text meant nothing, as she had never apologised for her actions, even now. She completely ignored me.
Anyway. At the end of the conversation, she said all she needs to know is that I will turn up to work, do my shift with 100% effort, and that she understands 'our relationship'.
Also - I think she recorded my conversation, or, that I was on loudspeaker the whole time and my boss was also listening. I could hear a funny echo. My friend said she heard the same thing, and thought it odd that J asked her several times 'Now, I need to know if you are NOT going to go for workers compensation and that you DID NOT do this injury at work'. She asked my friend to repeat it several times, so it's highly likely they recorded it. I should make it a point to mention to her one day that it is illegal to do that without consent...
I after that conversation, I emailed my dad about it, and applied for five jobs online. My dad sent me a late email telling me that if my heart wasn't in it anymore and the workplace had gone sour, that I should leave soon and not let it drag me down. Something will turn up, he said. You just have to look.
I am planning on spending the weekend studying, and will set aside an hour to print resumes, track down a lovely old couple who employed me a few years ago to use as a reference, and spend a few afternoons next week visiting businesses in the area to find SOMETHING. I can't work for someone who can't admit even one fault about herself.
I started looking in earnest for jobs on the weekend - and not just low level customer service jobs. I decided to look at government jobs, council jobs, hospital administration, banking etc etc. I figured there must be some sort of entry level job I'm qualified for (I have several administration certifications...).
There are heaps!
And now I am in a bit of a dilemma. I've found one that sounds like it was made for me:
Financial Planners Assistant at (Big 4) Bank, part-time, must be database & word processer proficient. Suited to someone studying finance (their exact words) or looking for an entry level banking job.
Anyway. So the dilemma is, that is a job that I would LOVE. It would allow me to work my way up and help me on some levels with my studies.
However, we've decided to have a baby next year. I can't with good conscience start a job as an assistant to someone if I knew I would be leaving next year. And it would rule out my chances of working for the copany again, methinks. I don't really want to put off starting a family either - if I start a new job like this, I won't want to leave it after one or two years, so that rules that out.
Anyway. I guess I just have to hope that a position makes itself available when I'm ready to go back to work in two years time or so.
There are others out there, but this one seemed to sing a song to me, lol.
My second dilemma is... Well. It's not really a dilemma. It is just making me nervous, so I have been putting it off for a few days.
I have realised that it's probably fair to tell my employers I'm looking for a job. But I also realised I could give them a chance to offer me something, if they think I'm valuable enough. Either that, or it will help them focus on their OTHER staff members, all of whom feel as though they are being treated like crap at the moment. I figure this conversation can only have good outcomes, no matter how ugly it will be.
What I intend to do first, is ask them if I can use them as a reference. She will then ask 'You're not leaving are you?' (Which is what she said when I told her I had started studying). I then plan to tell her that I honestly don't know, it depends what I can find. Depending on how that goes, I planned to tell her that of what I've looked at, there are a lot of office jobs. I also intend to slip in a few things about pay (seeing as I am underpaid for the work I do). I expect that she will probably shoot back about how they have 'given me' more hours when I 'needed it', of which I will remind her that the only reason I was 'given' those hours were because another staff member left and that if they had not, I would not have been 'given' the extra hours.
That is all I can think of at this stage. I am one of the only staff members that does not mind talking to her - she is extremely blunt and has no people skills. I can be very honest, and don't really care what people think of me, so we manage to have a good conversation where another might be bawling
The biggest problem I have with her is that she always has to remind us staff of how 'good' they are to us - when most of the time, it is only when it suits them. And the psychological mind-games annoy me as well - they will cut your hours, and then 'give you' one extra shift two weeks later, and stand there waiting for you to jump up and down and say thankyou.
In other news, I fell asleep on the couch listening to my Law lecture on my iPhone yesterday! :S
Thanks everyone for all the congratulatory messages on my last post At the moment, I should be writing out invitations to our post-wedding party, but I thought I should do a quick update post.
We decided in the end to get someone in to do the food. We are still saving a lot of money compared to what other people do for their weddings (well, some people). I'm not thrilled about the expense, but I began to realise it would be far too difficult to co-ordinate food for 80 people. Hiring some sort of heating equipment (and getting it there, then cleaning and getting it back), buying ingredients and making the food would probably come close to what it is costing us in the end anyway, for someone else to do it.
We also decided on something a little different from the usual 'wedding fare' meals too (seeing as technically, it's not a wedding at all..):
I am excited because it's also slightly entertaining to watch it being made as well. DF's never heard of it, and even though he's not a huge fan of rice meals (he doesn't hate rice, he would just rather eat pasta or noodles), he agreed to it and I think he's relieved we don't have to organise so much food now. Who knows, this might be the rice dish I can cook in the future that he actually wants to eat... I think because the meat paella has four types of meat in it, he's happy . (chorizo, beef, lamb & chicken). The vegan one has artichokes, olives, beans, zucchini etc etc.
Total cost for the catered main meal is $1320 - for the max amount of guests. It will probably be a bit less once we get all the rsvp's in.
I have offers from friends and family already in regards to the nibblies/fingerfood side of things - YAY. It looks like in the end, we will only have to pay for the main meal, hall rental, and some champagne (unless my dad pays for it, which he probably will).
There's only one tricky part: My mum and DF's dad want to go halves in paying for the catering. I already know neither of them can afford it - I know it's three months away, but they are terrible with money, and we will probably never hear the end of it. I only just yesterday had a heated conversation with my mother over the fact that she couldn't afford to buy my sister (the one that lives with us) school shoes! She proceeded to rattle off the bills she had to pay and the money she earns. I was probably being rude, but I cut her off mid-sentance. Partly because I'm sick of hearing about how she doesn't have any money all the time (mostly being her own fault - cigarettes, booze & gambling will strip your wallet, it has been shown) and partly because I had just paid $2k worth of our own household bills (lots of the annual ones come in february) and was annoyed to hear my mum have to whine about paying a $40 phone bill. Sigh!
Anyway. So even though DF and I don't have a lot of money at the moment as DF hasn't been working a lot (tradesmen typically have the slowest months in Jan & Feb) and I would love to take them up on the offer, I just don't think I can.
In the end, our invitations have a small part that says gifts are not essential, but if guests think it is neccessary, we would have a wishing well to donate to our future family fund. We are planning to put all the money away for next year when we intend to (hopefully) start a family.
My best friend is making the cake for us All in all, I am happy that this has been a very lower-cost event. On the other end of the spectrum, a friend of a friend just got engaged. By the third day of engagement, she had booked the venue, decided on the menu, colour scheme, month and date, decorations, invitations, and is actually looking for a dress today. Just crazy. She has booked out an entire venue. Originally it was for only 40 people - and then suddenly 'for only a few thousand more, we could book the whole place', so that's what they did. Or, I should say... SHE did. The groom has very little input. :S
This is also rather awkward, because of the 80 guests we have invited, she is not one of them. We simply do not have the space - the hall takes 70 comfortably, and we are inviting 80. We are waiting for a few 'No' rsvp's from relatives who live in other states, and then will decide to send out a few extra invitations to others. Is that rude? As long as they don't know, I thought it should be alright? The first batch of invitations are being sent this week - with rsvp date by 7th April. The second batch of invitations will be sent hopefully before the start of April. There are only about 10 extras. They are not expecially close, it is just the polite thing to do I guess (my boss and his wife and kids, that girl I mentioned previously and her fiance, and another two couples we know who we only see occasionally).
And lastly, all I can say on this subject is, how do people find wedding planning fun? Honestly. I am not even having a proper wedding, it has none of the fluff that a normal wedding has, and I find it especially tedious and stressful.
And now to go onto more interesting topics.
We are selling a couple of books on ebay. I hope to list them tonight, and am hoping to get ~$40 each for them. DF also wants to sell two watches he has. Not sure how much we'll get for those. Anything is fine really. It's about decluttering really.
I get my results TOMORROW for my first go at university. Keep your fingers crossed for me. I also start again on Monday, I am doing Business Law. Only one subject this semester.
Next week I plan to hand out my resume at local businesses. I am just looking for part-time work, afternoons or weekends. My hours were cut at my cake-decorating job again. Only half an hour a day, but that is 2 hours a week - a bit over $40. Adds up, especially when you're the only one earning a wage!
I was fine about it when my boss told me, until he started to whine about how they were struggling, and how they were going to have to 'take out another loan'. Which is when I flipped a little (in my head - not actually at him). His first loan that he was talking about? Was for his BOAT! Excuse me, I do not care about your money troubles if you are going to make unwise decisions at a bad time financially for your business! So, I just said 'Yep, that's fine. I'm going to get another job on the weekends anyway, because DH only works one or two days a week at the maximum now. We have this party thing to pay for, as well as my text books and materials for uni, and a mortgage and all the bills that come with that.' He then starts apologising to me, and lo and behold I get a call that afternoon from his wife, offering me a Saturday shift next week (just one, I might add) as another colleague is going away. If I hadn't said anything, I doubt I would have gotten it. And it also annoys me how they play these psychological games - take something away then give a little back so that you have to show that you're grateful, and that they really ARE looking out for you. Pssht. Yeah right.
Anyway! That is my life in a nutshell at the moment. I am sure there is more stuff but that's all I can think of for now. And I sure have written enough anyway...
When I started getting ready to study for uni, I was looking for blogs about people studying and couldn't find many. Now I know why - they are all too busy to blog!
I have downloaded a Wordpress app which I might use to start up a blog there. Though, I've never used wordpress and it looks a bit foreign. Has anyone ever used it here?
Things are hectic here and I'm a bit stressed. To say the least.
I will be glad when Christmas and the New Year is over. All it ever does is seem to put strain on the everyday hustle and bustle and make everything seem so much more stressful and rushed. People are crazy this time of year - driving, shopping etc. Just crazy, rude, unthoughtful...
Study is ... ok. Some days I like it. Some days I hate it. Sometimes I see myself achieving the things I set out to do in terms of study & career... then other days I really just don't.
So, I'm not sure how it will work out. At this stage, I am just taking it day by day, week by week, course by course. I refuse to pay $1000+ per course and FAIL due to slackness or lack of motivation, so I am obviously studying and working my butt off. And I have enrolled in my next two courses for February.
But there are days where I just don't get the grasp of what I am studying and it just seems to make everything hard and difficult and stressful. Of course, THOSE are the days where I want to quit! The days where I am doing fine and picking up the theory - are the days where I imagine myself completing the degree and getting a job. Of course!
Work seems to be getting worse and worse. In the new year, I think I will begin looking for a new job. I am just not sure what is out there, or if I will be any good at a new place. My heart is just not in my current work any more. Well - not in the PLACE - I do like the actual work. It is just the boss really, and his wife, and the way they run things. I just can't stand it any more and my mood goes from relatively balanced to unhappy each time I step in the door in the morning to start work.
I do have some goals for the new year, so hopefully I will get some time over the next week to post them.
All the weight (4kgs) I lost last summer and kept off over winter has returned! So I currently feel fat and unhealthy. I blame my sister living with us - she is a teenager and eats like a horse. When I see her eating suddenly I feel like eating - so that has to stop! (it has, already... but there is a long road ahead of losing those kilos I gained, and further losing the kilos I had planned to lose this year and haven't). Grr.
Aldi has opened last week, closer to us than the other one I used to go to. I won't be going there until the new year, but I am looking forward to the savings.
That's all my updates for now. Whew.
So yesterday I recieve the news that I am now downgraded from two days to one day a week at my book-keeping job, and my pay will be cut in half per hour as well. Not sure when it was supposed to start, but I was so annoyed that I decided to not go in to work today. Not sure they will miss me, because I was pretty mad yesterday. I mean, I understand hard times call for these measures. But I don't think they need to be that extreme. If I were being that extreme, I would not cut a workers pay to a quarter of what it was. But anyway. This is why I am annoyed:
- DF's pay will be cut. Not sure how much, but he sacrificed $1.50 per hour a year ago to give his apprentice a pay rise. That apprentice has since qualified and left, and DF did not regain the p/h rate. He also only gets paid a max of 8 hours per day but is sometimes away from home for 12 hours.
- DF's apprentice is being cut from 38 hours a week to just 15 (so is going from full-time to part-time).
And the owners of the business, DF's dad and my mother...?
Nope. That's it. Oh I think they said something about 'oh and we will have to cut back too...' Which doesn't really mean anything based on past events.
Anyway. So yes, I'm very annoyed right now. But I am trying to make the most of it.
I have listed 5 items on eBay and 4 have watchers, and 1 already has a bid.
I'm going to catch up on some internet surveys. Even if it's only a couple of bucks I am sure it is worth it.
Also I plan to do a spot of gardening. It's rather overcast and raining today, which is probably the best conditions for it anyway.
I'm going to get some laundry done and do a lot of cleaning up. We have guests staying on Friday night, and are going away on Saturday for a friends childs first birthday.
I also have to find a tiny little tshirt to screenprint as a gift.
I am going to drop some hints at work and try to pick up another day - otherwise I will begin to look for some part-time work elsewhere. At the moment I am just not very confident in myself, I have had the same jobs for 8 years and 5 years - I am not so sure how I would go in a new environment, you know? I guess it's just the new-job jitters. But, I think I'd like something customer-service-ey or food-industry related - something where I can go and not have to think too much, as with the family business it was all worry, stress, worry, stress. And coupled with starting uni I think the least amount of thinking I can get away with at work is a good thing!
DF and I are in an uncertain times at the moment. I think that my university course was started at a perfect time, because it gives me direction, even though the next 6 years are undoubtedly going to be tough. DF's dads business appears to be coming to a close. His dads inability to control his expenditure and finances, and take in any advice from others, means that in the next few months, unless some miracle happens, he may have to sell his house to pay his debts, and the business which has been running for nearly 10 years will have to fold. This leaves DF out of full-time work, and me out of part-time work. I don't see getting a job to be a big problem - I think that there is a lot of work out there, just not the glamorous, sought after jobs. If DF and I were in need of jobs, we would not be picky, which I think is a problem around here.
In other news, I am close to getting to a point where I feel that I would be better off never talking to or seeing my mother again. People constantly say that family is blood, and you can never let anything get in the way of that. But I know many of you SA'ers out there don't talk to close family at all, and it gives me hope that I am not the horrible person that I will no doubt be made out to be in the next couple of weeks. I don't really want to get into it in much detail (trust me, this entry could be a novel describing the events that have transpired over the past couple of days), as I am sure a few regular readers know of the difficulties I have with my mother and her drinking problems, paranoia and gambling problems etc etc. But basically the latest is that my DF is the alcoholic, and he is a bully and my mother is 'concerned' that I am with him. But when I questioned her on why, apparently it is because he confronted her yet again, this morning and yesterday, about her drinking and gambling habits. After some words from me, now she says she is no longer concerned about me, because I am 'the same as him'.
Seeing as in the 7.5 years DF and I have been together we have never fought and never separated, and always encouraged each other to have friends and have outside interests - I am glad DF and I are 'the same'.
In comparison, my mother and her partner have had hundreds of alcohol-fueled arguments and have separated completely and lived separately four times in the ten years they have been together. My mother has also driven all of her partners friends away and gets paranoid and jealous whenever he attempts to see a few mates who have stuck by him, or play a rare game of golf without her.
So, I guess I am glad that I am who I am, and DF is who he is. In the end, we should surround ourselves with positive and supportive people. My mother is not positive or supportive towards me, and I am not towards her. So I guess it is a two-way street really, and we would both be better off.
On another note, my eldest sister does not talk to my mum either, and has sworn she will not for another 9 years. It was for a completely different reason, but I wonder how many siblings it will take before she realises her mistakes?
Our tax refund hit our account today. Woo! ~$3k.
Though it is rather stressful at the moment. I am trying to not let it weigh me down too much, but DF's dads business is not doing so well. Just when DF's dad had turned a corner financially speaking, and it looked like he might be able to manage his money appropriately - the industry up and dies on us! I am keeping my fingers crossed that he gets a slew of jobs to keep them super busy up until the new year - which is generally what happens, but not so sure it will happen this year with the economy and all. They say it's picking up, but I don't know who 'they' are or where they work either.
What worries me most is DF's ability to find another job. Well, let me rephrase. I don't doubt his ability to find a job (he is skilled in several industries), rather his motivation. Sometimes it seems like he has blind faith and loyalty to the business, and won't consider looking for outside work. Even when there is no work, he will do something to do with the family business (which equals no pay, obviously) instead of, I don't know... day labour? listing some junk on ebay?
So, that is what is stressing me right now. Even though the tax refund calmed my fears a little bit, not I am not so sure if we should go ahead with our plans to buy a new TV. We are already discussing downsizing from the original idea of a 40" to a 32". I know a flat screen TV is not a neccesity - which is why we have not bought one yet - but it is something we have wanted to buy ourselves for a reallllly long time (like, five-years-long-time). And seeing as every tube-tv we have has broken in some way or another, bar the one we are currently using - which is about to, I might add, it is not as if we are going out and just buying one because everyone else has one.
Anyway. To further stress me out, DF has a couple of days off work right now, and is utilising his apprentice (who must work every day - or get paid for doing nothing) to paint the exterior of our house. I just wonder how much the paint is going to cost. Though, I do forget sometimes that we have money put aside for renovations. And I guess we are saving a lot of money by not paying someone to do it. And atleast DF is actually doing something productive. I guess I should just calm down and breathe.
Thanks for letting me get that out. You know when things seem so much bigger in your head? Yeah, that.
In other news, I registered Banjo finally today, and re-registered Jed for the year. $20 it cost to register them! Instead of $224 it would have cost if we hadn't de-sexed and microchipped them. The surgery will pay for itself in two more years.
On another note, they also seem, dare I say, a little happier? Since the surgery there has been NO, I repeat NO pee on our deck. It's incredible. And Jed seems to be finally mellowing a little bit, which is nice. Though we have another couple of years with Banjo acting like a crazed little thing before they both settle down. Banjo is much nicer and easier to hold than Jed (don't know how long that will last - Banjo is definately smaller than Jed which is one thing, but he is still growing), though now Jed will have moments where he will sit on your lap and not try to cover your face in slobber and claw you. For about two minutes. This morning I read two pages of a book before I had to put him down. It was lovely!
I know this completely contradicts my previous whine about money (or lack of), but in my defense I have been looking out for this sale for aaaaages. It just so happened to appear during the week where I have a big stress. *sigh*.
Anyway: every year Clinique have a special 'Gift Time' sale where if you spend over $60 you get a free makeup bag full of products. I always try to buy my foundation during this time. I pretty much buy foundation and an eyeliner pencil- any other makeup products I use come directly from this 'freebie' I get. I'm kinda cheap when it comes to makeup - except for the fact that I don't actually use 'cheap' brands, I buy the absolute basic items and everything else I do without unless I get it for free somehow. So anyway, I bought it today. The foundation is $49 and the eyeliner is $36. Eyeliner lasts me about 3 years - foundation about 1. They did not have my shade in stock, so they gave me a sample pot and will call me when it comes in. I also signed up for their rewards program. For every 200 points you get $10 to spend. I already have 85 points. It's at a chemist, so I am sure I will buy other items from them anyway.
I made a delicious pumpkin, feta & caramelised onion tart for dinner last night. We had it with a garden salad and steamed vegetables, and because DF is working at home today, I was able to take the leftovers for lunch. So good!
My little sister is due to go home tomorrow as our mother is back from her trip. I have noticed over the week how much my poor little sister cares about what people think/what she looks like/what clothes she wears/letting down her friends/going to parties etc. Also realised how much I DO NOT CARE. Is that a good or a bad thing? I am polite and nice, which helps I guess. Not sure if DF and I were at all a grounding influence on her, but I hope to maybe some extent we were. She does not get a lot of support from our mother, but maybe staying with us she has realised there is a bigger picture in life than the things she is currently worrying about. In *so many* ways my little sister and I are similar, but unfortunately my little sister is rather impressionable, which I never was. I wasn't really an outcast at school but I was always on the sideline because I didn't really understand why everyone worried about stupid little things when there was so much more to consider in life.
First of all, guys might want to skip this entry
Three years ago I found a lump in my breast. It took me six months to actually go and get it checked (I know, I know). So I got an ultrasound done, went back to my then-doctor and he said I had a benign cyst and it wasn't anything to worry about.
Anyway, fast forward to this year, and I notice that I get a bit of pain every now and then. So I go and see the doctor (a different one from the first time, I have been seeing the current doctor for about two years and like her). She refers me to get another ultrasound.
I go in today to get it done, and the radiologist tells me that particular lump is fine - it is just tissue. HOWEVER, she tells me on the report that I had three years ago it mentions I have a fibroadenoma as well - which is news to me, as the doctor never mentioned it at the time.
She says to me "Usually your doctor is supposed to get a sample of the tissue by inserting a needle. If the sample is fine, they will just leave it alone. However, your doctor doesn't seem to have done that. But, this was found three years ago, and if it was a baddie, you'd be dead by now, so obviously it's not, and you probably won't need to get it done."
Feeling a little weird right now, but atleast it was good news, so far, atleast.
I spent $8.30 on a coffee and a date & apple muffin. The ultrasound was free, and I am going grocery shopping this afternoon when I finish work. I only plan to get a couple of items, so fingers crossed it's only about $50 or so. For some reason I always underestimate how much groceries are going to cost. I expect $30 when the total actually comes to ~$70. I guess my mind needs to catch up with inflation!
Obviously I completed some of my to-do list from my previous entry Now that I have had my ultrasound, I need to book an appointment with the doctors. I also booked Banjo in for his vaccinations on Saturday. I chose a Saturday so that DF can stay with Jed. It will be the first time they are apart since we got Banjo - interesting to see how they are when they are separated! I asked the vet about de-sexing, and they only need 1-2 days notice. So I am thinking of booking them in either separately or at the same time, next week or the week after.
Who has had their dog de-sexed in the past couple of years? Is there anything I should know? Do they have to rest afterwards? What about playing together? How long until they fully recover?