Today my older sister called - she lives in the city so I don't get to see her often. She is going to the UK very soon on a holiday. Because our mum was born in Wales we are able to get an ancestral visa, allowing us to work and live in the UK and EU for 4 years, and then we can apply for residency.
All my sister needs for this is a copy of my mums Birth Certificate, signed by a Justice of the Peace. All easy to do, you would think, on my mums part. Something you think a mother would gladly do for her daughter, right?
Wrong.
At first, she said yes. She even copied the documents and everything.
But all of a sudden, she changed her mind (I did not know this - I thought she had sent them). She sent my sister a text message that said, she had thought about it and decided not to do it for my sister, as my sister is not a seasoned traveler (whatever the F that means). She does not believe that my sister 'deserves' this.
I am SO f&!@#ing angry right now. How is that our mothers decision, how is that her right, to say that her daughter doesnt DESERVE to live in the UK for 4 years???
Of course, that is my mother for you. When you need something from her, she is manipulative and controlling. And she makes such a big deal out of what she is doing for you. I just can't believe hwo much of a control-freak she is being.
Long story short, my sister rang me and told me all that, and that she has told our mum that she no longer wants anything to do with her, atleast for a while. My sister told me she, at this moment, feels she would like to not talk to our mother for at least ten years. Some of you know some of my previous stories about my mother, so you can probably understand that I agree with my sister 100%. It's so hard to explain, but I can't put into words how much of a piece of work my mother is.
Oh, and my younger brother and sister, 14 and 15 years old, who live at home still, are not allowed contact with my older sister now. I find it completely ridiculous. My mother raves on and on about 'segregation of family' and how people 'disrespect her', and yet, she is the one that segregates everyone, and can you really blame any of us for disrespecting her???
*SIGH*
My poor sister, she only has bought her ticket to france and is now saving her spending money. She was relying on this working visa, she will only have $4000 in spending money.
ARGHHH.
i am SO angry
June 28th, 2009 at 10:11 am
June 28th, 2009 at 10:37 am 1246181820
June 28th, 2009 at 11:36 am 1246185410
June 28th, 2009 at 12:30 pm 1246188630
June 28th, 2009 at 12:42 pm 1246189361
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June 28th, 2009 at 02:37 pm 1246196231
June 28th, 2009 at 05:08 pm 1246205295
June 28th, 2009 at 06:10 pm 1246209033
She can do it on her own.
June 28th, 2009 at 06:32 pm 1246210368
http://www.ukvisas.gov.uk/en/howtoapply/infs/inf9ukancestry
June 28th, 2009 at 07:31 pm 1246213872
But yes, a 27 year old should be allowed to choose where their destiny lies. If even a parent will not support this (and this is quite unfortunate indeed), then it's time to move on without them.... Yeah, I know that things are not always as easy as I am typing this but....
June 28th, 2009 at 10:29 pm 1246224569
i can't sneak in and get her birth certificate copies because it needs to be signed by a JP - and she needs to be present for that.
she has to get the visa before she goes over there, so she can't do it while she's there.
it might be difficult for her to get a copy of our mothers certificate from the registrars office because its under suppresion (long story - ex husband).
*sigh*
June 29th, 2009 at 09:27 pm 1246307274
Can you consult with the British consul in Australia as to what can be done in this situation? Because your sister has that right irrespectively of her mother's attitude and there must be some other way to get the documentation to prove it.
In the meantime, if you could put joint pressure on her with whatever leverage you have... Being mean in this situation is totally acceptible.
June 29th, 2009 at 11:40 pm 1246315250
she's a lovely person SOMETIMES. but sometimes isn't enough. ech.